Friday, September 30
Playing it safe and sane
I'm attracted to obscure, harmless subjects like geology and paleontology because they seem a safe refuge from swirling thought. I feel like my greatest talents of observation and analysis lie in things like psychology and philosophy, but endless musing in these directions has proved fruitless when it comes to finding peace in my life. So I choose to spend my time pursuing more esoteric pursuits. I feel that many people will look at me in this role and decide that I haven't the stuff it takes to do the other, that I am running from that world out of a lack of understanding or identifying. Quite the opposite. I feel that given the proper motivation, I could have written admirable works of literature, or made well-received films, or contributed to the sciences, or championed some great cause, or become a well-known eccentric or funny man, or seeded a cult around some original new idea. But I don't want any of that. I don't see the point. To become famous? That holds no appeal for me. To become rich? I am afraid of becoming greedy and corrupt. I want a simple life. To realize some unused potential? The fact that I know I could do it (or could have) is enough for me. I don't need to prove anything to anyone else. If it helps me to keep my sanity by diverting my intellect into less ambitious endeavors, than that is exactly what I will do.
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2 comments:
it's funny. a lot of these posts read like they could have been written by me (if i had the mental cohesion to get them out of my head).
I agree with your post. Nothing should be done for the sake of others' approval or disapproval. But I also find that when I really get down and think about why I haven't done all the things I think I'm capable of, it only has to do with my own insecurity and fear of change.
I'm sure a lot of well-known people do what they do for the fame, but also many that do what they do to prove to themselves that they can. The fame is a side-effect.
Good point. I tend to assume people do things for recognition and approval, probably because I do. But I'm learning to answer more to my own inner voice, and it makes sense that many others do that already. Good lesson.
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