MANIA

inspiration near?
oh no...
deep in here,
burns something infernal
something eternal
lets me sleep mere hours
then whips me awake
at the height of my powers
while my thoughts churn

and CERN has nothing on me
when I'm in the throes of
my fantastic,
drastic reverie:
my haemoglobin races
like swarms of foul horses
around a track they attack
like rowdy, fell forces
seeming to lack

all that is fair in being human;
just drive me on, roaring!
ignoring all the facts
like the cracks that appear
and the fear
in my countenance
shaking and longing
for some true rest,
comfort in a warm nest.

but I am denied
until the storm passes
and the grapes decide to die
whither wasted upon their vine
and then it's that time
to sleep for days on end
and lose my mind
and this is no more kind
than that devil engine,

but it's my lot in life -
I drew the bad straw
well I must have...
though I don't remember it
every september and october
brings hell with it
like my world is nearly over
moreover,
it's a fuse to no good use

except to abhor.
filled with invective,
I lose my collective wits
and reel around infected
check all perspective
at the door
then scrabble for my pills;
I'm too young to be this way,
too old and unsure.