Tuesday, August 21

Triptych

The moon glowed gold tonight like
A tooth in the sky, curved to rend the flesh
Or just a horn of plenty gone to find itself some rest
Yes, the moon glowed gold tonight.

I was watching as it sneaked through the trees, yeah
Watch it travel in whatever way it pleased
A swarm of bees was buzzing all the day, yeah
I was sleeping for to make them go away.

To make everything the sun showed go away.

Now it's night again, Lord oh Lord
Time for all good men
To do the Christian thing and tuck in
But my spirit is tired; I don't know where it's been.

The city lights were dim and distant tonight
And I turned around, seeing black and white
Police car out of service made me nervous
Policemen are the Devil's children.

Now it's night again, Lord of Lords
Time for all true men
Who feel it in their hearts
To take shelter from the dark, unseeing.

What am I to be if not a human being?
What will all the people in the city think of me?
What will they whisper if they know that I'm not free?
What kind of coward is afraid of anything?
What kind of father will I make when the spring
Turns to summer and a mother feels I'm not worth a thing?
What about the fall when the animals call
What about the changing of the old roles for all?
What about love when the chill of winter crawls
Over mountains where the people make their sprawl?
What about the memories of names etched in a wall
Dying to save what was always bound to fall?
Why all the tears when they met you in the hall?
Why so many cheers when the other man's gone?
Got what he gave out and now the righteous ones bawl
Who kept their sons here to play scholarship football
Only the poor and desperate ever heed the call
Huns of California trying to build a new wall
Me I've got my own life and it hasn't got room
For fighting any wars or have me marching off to doom
To see the zippered body bags who's harvest came too soon
To see the coffins stacked up to the moon.

Some people need anger management for stress
Others compassion in a crash-course lesson
Some need to learn tact
Others need to learn to look back
At themselves in the mirror when they
Hear their words of vitriol attack.

Some people should go dig a hole and die
Some people would like just that
But they don't know how
Some people live like robots and can't say why
They persist in doing what they do
Some people are evil yet they haven't got a clue.

The moon glowed gold tonight like
A fang in the sky, curved to rend the flesh
Or maybe just a baby out to find itself some rest
Who the righteous bless can never truly die
Under the ribbon of a milky white sky, yes
The moon glowed gold tonight.

God save our souls tonight.

9 comments:

Sara said...

You have a crazy ability to project a multi-racial voice. Maybe because you are??

Sometimes I get a bit cross reading your blog because a lot of this stuff should get published and not just here on the blogosphere. There is so much talentless shit in print out there, and then there are people who truly have a gift, yet remain for the most part unread.

Get it sorted!
love Little Miss Bossy.

Metamatician said...

Will you marry me? =)

Kidding of course but you're gonna make my head too big to wear any a mi hats dem!

Thank you. I would like to get published. Any tips?

Sara said...

Thank you for your kind proposal Sir. Maybe in the next life, ok?

As for getting published, a mixture of persistence and luck I think. In your case, persistence would probably get you as far as you want to go. In my case, luck would help! But then I believe we may both be self saboteurs...

Metamatician said...

Sure we are self-saboteurs (is that like self-abusers?). I have the kind of darkness and fear in my heart such that I like the comfort of knowing I write well, if I can say that without sounding too conceited, and as long as it stays small like this and my only critics are friends and family, I won't lose that special love of mine for putting pen to paper, or fingers to keys.

I feel (most of the time, subconsciously) that even were I to make it into the big world of published books, my stuff would sit and gather dust in a corner somewhere and not make a second run, or else I'd find a few odd people who really dug it and I'd have a tiny cult audience, but still be just the tiniest of fish in an ocean dominated by sharks who write FOR the market.

I refuse to compromise my writing, to write "genre" fiction or pleasant poetry with rounded corners. But I'm also a bit competitive (read: insecure) when I don't keep that emotion in check, and to just succeed a little when I apparently have all this talent would irk me I think.

I know sales do not equate to quality. But sometimes they do. Look at Life of Pi: Bestseller, I'm sure it made Yann Martel a rich man, and yet it's a no-compromise work of genius and originality. If I could do something like that, I would be very happy.

But if I poured out my heart sincerely and no one bought my stuff, or I compromised my style to appeal to a broader audience, I would feel terrible. And I probably would not enjoy writing as much any more. So it's a complex issue.

As to your claiming any success on your own part would be attributable to luck, that's absurd. You write phenomenally and it's mainly your irreverent and intelligent humor even while relaying a sad or serious tale, and not having the two clash, that appeals to me. You have my same sense of irony and absurdity. Nearly every time I read your blog, I have at least one hearty laugh, and I also leave it feeling thoughtful and inspired to write something of me own.

Don't short-change yourself! I won't have it.

Sara said...

Wow.. I genuinely don't know what to say. Maybe thank you? Or synchronise time machines for the next life?:-)

Metamatician said...

A time sync would be cool. Have you read Augusten Burroughs (Running With Scissors, Dry)? Your style reminds me a bit of his, in the fact that he's relaying these true autobiographical stories, and they're pretty horrible and certainly dysfunctional when you think about them, and yet his voice as narrator stays calm and even pokes fun at the absurdity of his situation. He never wallows in self-pity, he just takes whatever wacky things life throws at him in stride and somehow through it all remains positive and fascinated by the world.

That is a way of writing I could not pull off with any sincerity, because I must have a far different personality than he. But you are a bit more in that direction I think, perhaps like you say because you've wisened up after many bad experiences, or maybe you are just blessed with a resilient personality. In either case, I admire you for it.

Sara said...

You know, Meta, I guess this is why I want to write. Much of it is self therapy but it's when others like you are able to appreciate even a glimpse of my strange life and take something positive from it, whether that's an uplifted heart or just a downright good laugh at my occasionally bizarre sense of humour, then I do feel it's worthwhile. If just one person smiles or cries because they feel a little less alone in this fucked up world, then that's probably enough.

I'm so glad we met.

Sara said...

Oh, and no I haven't read Augusten Burroughs. I'd really like to and will try and locate a copy.

Also, there are now so many threads going on various posts, that I feel like a four year old trying to eat spaghetti! You get the picture?

Metamatician said...

I get it, and it ain't pretty.

I'm glad we met, too!

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