Monday, April 30

What the hell is Grimace anyway? A dinosaur? A sort of proto-Barney? A purple alien with an unexplained affinity for milkshakes? And why the name "Grimace" when he's always sporting a goofy grin? The weird thing is, he was always my favorite character in the psychedelic McDonald's mascot bullpen. But now that I'm older, I'm trying to figure out the truth behind this guy. Does anyone know? Is he real? Is he just a guy in a purple turd-shaped costume that runs around like a girl with his arms out begging for shakes? Is Grimace actually the secret CEO and mastermind behind McDonald's enormous success, because it's obviously not their food. This one needs to be researched, folks. Big time. Weigh in with your Grimace stories and theories.

5 comments:

Hans said...

This is one of those things you just don't want to question - only Ronald knows the truth, but if I had to guess, he probably pulled him out of the gutter and gave him a job out of Clown Guilt. When I give it more thought, his proportions equal that of the Biggie meals - an omen we didn't forsee 25 years ago.

Metamatician said...

True, maybe he started off as a normal, healthy human being and he was used as a test subject for McDonald's food products for like twenty years. I wouldn't be surprised if he were a bit radioactive as well.

Clown Guilt, lol.

Metamatician said...

Sorry for the double post, but that reminds me of something I read. Apparent in some Asian countries he's called Donald McDonald, because they have trouble with the "R". I'm serious about this, it was an Asian person who told me about it because he'd grown up his whole life thinking his first name was Donald as was surprised when he can to the US for university to find it wasn't. I've heard it from other sources too.

Hans said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Hans said...

Donald McDonald or Ronald Ruck - which one is Asian?

No offense to Asians, I'm just trying out my stand-up comedy spot for SNL.....can't wait for the inevitable shephard's hook.

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